The Messy Middle

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry, just had to get that out. I am in the middle of two different paintings and I am in that spot. The spot that I wonder if it is worth it to keep going, or if its just going to stay ugly forever. Well, never have I ever been wrong about pushing through with a project until the end. But man, if you could see what I look like or the pain and frustration on my face during this “Messy Middle” part, you would probably laugh.

I have had so many people throughout my life tell me that I must have it easy because art isn’t hard and that it is only fun. Are you kidding me? If you are someone like me, and you are trying to pursue your best artistic self, it is anything but easy. It can be a constant struggle, or it can flow, and you can have the time of your life.

Art is hard. Promoting yourself is hard. Pursuing your dream is hard. Sometimes life feels like the messy middle in times, but all it takes is one brush stroke to get you out of it- and you’re back baby!!

Here I go, through this messy middle. WISH. ME. LUCK.

-B

Blog Post 2: Inspiration- Where does it come from?

Throughout my art career, inspiration has been something that I have struggled with. It honestly was my enemy. I constantly wrestled with it. I would have an idea that inspired me once a year. And as it is known, that is not nearly enough to allow me to be a consistent artist. However, my inspiration block stopped when I started making the art I wanted to, and not what I thought people wanted.

Music has been a huge facilitator in the creativity realm for me. In my household music is incredibly important and is on constantly. Recently it has been music that has provoked inspiration within me. Country music in specific. I love the story-telling and descriptors within the lyrics and the melody almost always screams colors at me. I have been having fun with figuring out how to depict exactly what I see in my brain when I listen to the song and how to put it onto canvas for others to see.

What do you picture when you listen to your favorite song?

Blog Post 1: Why Now?

It’s funny being a kid. You think you can do anything. You can be an astronaut, a chef, a firefighter, or anything else you can put your mind to. You truly believe the world is yours and you can do what you want with it. That is, until you’re old enough that people tell you it isn’t realistic. Once you hear something enough times, you just start to believe it as a fact. That was me. I never thought I could ever make a name for myself as an artist or even consider it as a job. I had constant self-doubt and would sporadically paint here and there to fulfill my creative side, but that was it.

What changed my mind wasn’t something, it was someone. Believe it or not- my husband. At the ripe age of 25 we decided to pack our bags and follow a dream of his to be in the world of country music. His passion, hard work, and belief in himself radiated everywhere he went, and he might have even sprinkled a little of it on to me. My family and my friends are the best hype-people anyone could ever ask for. They have supported me in a way that has pushed me to make art for me, and for what I feel inspired to create.

Creating in general is not easy. It comes in waves. But now I let those waves take me, instead of holding my weight against them. Here is to little Bella, I think she’d be proud.

-Bella